It takes courage to grieve, to honour the pain we carry. We can grieve in tears, or in meditative silence, or in song, or in prayer.
In touching the pain of recent and long held griefs, we come face to face with our genuine human vulnerability, the helplessness and hopelessness. Those are the storm clouds of the heart.
Jack kornfeld.
I have just celebrated the end of my 44th year, August 22 nd. I awoke to a new year, the first day of my 45th year and my dreams showed me I still had some old grief. I began my day with an open heart and a willingness to see the vast possibilities which lies in this human world, because I felt blah and I wanted to at least open! I should not be surprised but I end up having a fantastical day right from the time I stumbled out of bed with my magical kids to the parking lot of Yoga Source. The most amazing thing is that my very existence is a miracle and everyone I communicate with are too.
Thanks to the peeps who shared their love for life and picked me up without knowing.
peace peace peace mama t
Today I woke up feeling calm yet I was sad. Sad for me. I have held on to so many demons for so long that perhaps they where what lead me in choices. Fear being the biggest one.
I’ve been planting the seeds of goodwill without bias, love without judgment, making these seeds grow need my continuous watering. More challenging than I thought. In the course of doing this I became acquainted with my barriers-numbness, inadequacy, skepticism, resentment, righteous indignation, pride, and all the other yuks.
As I continue to do this practice, I made friends with my fears, and my aversion. Unconditional good heart toward others is not even a possibility unless I attend to my own Demons. Everything I encounter then becomes an opportunity for practicing loving-kindness. This is Yoga. 
Peace mama t
From the instant I wake up the practice begins of not causing harm to anyone-myself or others- and every day, do what I can to be helpful. If I take this instruction to heart and begin to use it, I find that it is not easy. Before I know it, someone has provoked me and iether directly or indirectly, I’ve caused harm.
Therefore, when my intention is sincere but life’s uncertainty makes me feel less capable of the going through with my initial intention ……I need help. Help in a way which can calm my thoughts and my actions. The use of some fundamental instruction on how to lighten up and turn around my well established habits and seeing them as not separate from me but a part of me that teaches me what is freeing and what is not. The Practice of meditation (quiet time) enables me to be present and practice being conscious. Help from the community’s finest care providers such as, Karen Armstrong, Jo-Ann McRogers, Piper Martin and so many more are shining the light and creating space for you to see your light again. I thank these peeps of the community for believing in life and not judging and caring enough to create the lift we all need.
We are all light and that light may seem diminished when cloaked with self-hatred and the thoughts of separation, but all can be changed with choice to realize we are all light energy. Yes, some have chosen to sever their light by whatever trauma or repeat attachment to self-hatred or addictions, their light is still there, they are just not present. Being present you will see that there is no bad or good, rather only choices.
Thanks to all who share this light enthusiasm.
Keep on connecting with your light peeps, its always there. Choice is a gift. Accept it. It’s awesome! Be in the light you know how the bad guys end up!!
Peace mama t
These fabulous tools(activities)teach me how to create freedom and take everyone I can along the way!
Generosity. Giving as a path of learning to let go.
Discipline. Training in not causing harm in a way that is daring and flexible.
Patience.Training in abiding with the restlessness of our energy and letting things evolve at thier own speed. If waking up takes forever, still we go moment by moment, giving up all hope of fruition and enjoying the process.
Joyful enthusiasm. Letting go of our perfectionism and connecting with the living quality of every moment.
Meditation. Training in coming back to being right here with gentleness and precision.
Prajna. Cultivating an open, inquiring mind.
*Pema Chodron
I’m working every day in the most unpredictable moments, useing one of these activities with my children to contractors to landlords to create a sense of NOW. Hard -but I’m learning!
Life is good. I just have to choose to be a part of it!
Namaste
mama t
Troubling external events that effect us, often are seen as the nadir, the lowest point of the life cycle, from which we can only move upwards.
Perseverance, and trust in a divine order are called for when feeling that of a envy (stabbing in the back or heart) occur. At times a willingness to endure and accept that in the greater reality such difficulties and hardships may be necessary to restore unity or to ensure growth through atonement (at-one-ment) or sacrifice.
Please seek out support when needed be honest and know you are not alone, choose not to give up.
Never give up on this gift of life.
Live Fully!
Mama t
If I am not to fret or worry-Why a Yoga Studio owner, who only wishes to provide, support and help, is lost in the financial burden and questions of “do you do Hot Yoga”?! I guess I don’t know. I don’t have answers and at this point all I can suggest is my experience. I am confronted with a person afraid to see the truth and the thicker the excuses the deeper the mud and the answer less clear.
Peeps the answers are not in the how much you sweat or how much you weight or how flexible you are, but how much you are willing to enjoy this life without hurting yourself and others. Don’t bite off the hand that feeds you.
Life is an occassion Rise to it!
Love the company you keep and create the reality you want!
peace peace peace mama t
Because next thing you know this life is over!
Instead of fixing something from the past, perhaps its a time to create something more solid and authentic from the truth of what’s left of the rubble of what has come to pass. Cheers to that. I had a moment of what the practice of yoga does for the soul when it comes to relating to others. I am blessed to have had the experience of the practice and the graditude for what I have learned because of my practice. I am a better, tolerant and forgiving being because of it.
I am able to support my Dharma with just enough stuff and prosper and feel the freedom, or at least for today I am here, tomorrow -well that is just another day full of uncertainty. How exciting to be free to choose the direction of this journey in this vessel.
Two steps forward one back, is fine by me, because I know this being needs practice to grow.
Namaste mama t
I find myself crying and laughing in a spun echo of chaotic push and pull when it comes to being a Yoga studio owner. Careful not to step on toes or to disrupt the delicate foundation and all at the same time be a strong foundation that keeps yoga available to the persons who are curious to start thier practice. I Often ask myself, “What would I do if I close down this beautiful space?”, only because I am exhausted in working so hard behind the scenes to keep it open. I say, “Nothing, but be a yoga teacher.” Now the question is how do I continue to exist in this business world. I must admit living in this world is and could be very damaging emotionally. There are mean people who practice a type of yoga called “me, me yoga”. LOL Perhaps thats all I’m doing.
I hope the practice will continue to be individuals creating and refining the mind and cultivating clear perception so that we connect with, and act from, the place of true Self. I can only hope and trust.
Get out more often and do yoga on the mat, you may love the company.
See you here at the Source!
Namaste from my light to yours!
mama T
Yoga to some and to me is about refining the mind and cultivating clear perception so that we connect with, and act from, the place of true Self. This is an important step for me to process change in my habits; replacing old ways of thinking and reacting with new habits that serve me better.
Some days I have a strong urge to drink my tension away, instead of taking time to nurture the tension’s birth place. Pantanjali reminds us that this process of personal growth and development, of refining the mind and changing our habits, is something that happens gradually, over a long period of time. And, like a willing person learning a new skill, it’s a process of fits and starts. There is a flash of clarity, followed by a period of nonclarity. This flash of clarity followed by nonclarity may last days months or years. Even as these flashes of clarity become more frequent, I still feel I have taken one step back for every two steps forward.
I do notice myself responding to situations with more patience, yet I still lose my temper, or fall back into an old pattern of playing the victim, or revert to some other habit that isn’t serving me.
I now realize how blessed I am to have faith, strength and steadfastness to achieve higher levels of proficiency, refinement, and understanding. And by definition, my process cannot be compared with anyone else’s.
Compassion and patience for others processes have allowed me to feel empowered by the knowledge that I am enough, and I can move away from an attitude of judgment and comparison to one of appreciataion for my erfforts and the efforts of others.
Like I said, I sometimes have a strong urge to drink my tension away, yet I don’t and this is Yoga to me.
peace peace peace
mama t
A Warrior accepts that we can never know what will happen to us next. The central question of a warrior’s training is not how we avoid uncertainty and fear but how we relate to discomfort. People like Mother Teresa and Martin Luther King-who recognized that the greatest harm comes from our own aggressive minds. They devoted their lives to helping others understand this truth. There are also many ordinary people who spend their lives training in opening their hearts and minds in order to help others and themselves do the same. Like them, we could learn to relate to ourselves and our world as warriors. We could train in awakening our courage and love.
There are practices for nurturing our capacity to rejoice, to let go, to love, and to shed a tear. There are those that teach us to stay open to uncertainty. There are others that help us to stay present at the times that we habitually shut down.
I’m working on all.
Authenticity is my daily practice. Uncertainty is the new certain.
peace peace peace Mama t and Pema Chodron
I have just celebrated the end of my 44th year, August 22 nd. I awoke to a new year, the first day of my 45th year and my dreams showed me I still had some old grief. I began my day with an open heart and a willingness to see the vast possibilities which lies in this human world, because I felt blah and I wanted to at least open! I should not be surprised but I end up having a fantastical day right from the time I stumbled out of bed with my magical kids to the parking lot of Yoga Source. The most amazing thing is that my very existence is a miracle and everyone I communicate with are too. 
